Hung

Vladimir: (...) What do we do now?
Estragon: Wait.
Vladimir: Yes, but while waiting.
Estragon: What about hanging ourselves?
Vladimir: Hmm. It'd give us an erection!
Estragon: (highly excited). An erection!
Vladimir: With all that follows. Where it falls mandrakes grow. That's why they shriek when you
pull them up. Did you not know that?
Estragon: Let's hang ourselves immediately!
(...)
Vladimir: Well? What do we do?
Estragon: Don't let's do anything. It's safer.
Vladimir: Let's wait and see what he says.
Estragon: Who?
Vladimir: Godot.
Estragon: Good idea.
(...)
Silence. They remain motionless, arms dangling, heads sunk, sagging at the knees.

Waiting For Godot

Samuel Beckett

Strange

People are strange when you're a stranger

Faces look ugly when you're alone

Women seem wicked when you're unwanted

Streets are uneven when you're down

When you're strange

Faces come out of the rain

When you're strange

No one remembers your name

When you're strange

People are strange

The Doors

Absurdity

"In a universe that is suddenly deprived of illusions and of light, Man feels a stranger. His is an irremediable exile. This divorce between Man and his life, the actor and his setting truly constitutes the feeling of absurdity"

Albert Camus

Thoughts of a dying thought

Is it really dark?

Or have I become blind?

Am I really alone and lonely?

Or am I pushing people away from me?

Is there something called joy?

Or am I no longer able to feel

Nothing but a deaf agony?

I was dying for a meaning

Now, I'm dying for dying

I was weeping for a sense

Now, I'm weeping for an eternal rest

Something is perishing inside of me

Something is perishing inside of me

I found meaning in meaninglessness

In this sterile life

I found meaning in my suicidal dreams

In the booth of my screams

I'm so tired

I'm a bunch of aches

With bleeding veins

Realizing I'm alive

Tears me apart

Breathing makes me cry

I'm broken into pieces

Shattered carelessly on the ground

I'm fucked by life

No need for a poison tonight

The poison is already inside

Eating is a poison to my body

Thinking is a poison to my mind

Feeling is a poison to my heart

I'm fucked by life

Waste is my past

Waste is my future

Waste is the name of my path

So

Bring me a gun

Help end my suffocation

Is it fun?

seeing me twisting and burning

Bring me a gun

And I'd give you the rest of my years

I'd shoot the pain away

And I'll be shot with the pain

Just bring me a gun

Be happy for my destiny

And miss me when I'm gone

I'm so tired

Tortured by life

It's only you and I, Mr Moonlight

And the very dead sound of sadness

With the stars

Witnessing my great fall

To you

I confess my vows

To you

I offer my soul

Death, have mercy on me

Stop this agony

I've been left to myself

Even words deserted me

With midnight tears

I'll sleep tonight

And I'll have visions

Of the cemetery of my dreams

Where's the fucking gun?!

April 29th, 2008

To Talk To You

Oh grandmother

How I miss you

Under the earth

Wish I was with you

To talk to you

To talk to you

...

If I lay on the earth

Could you hear

Oh grandmother

I'm so lonely

All my life

If I lay on the earth

Could you hear then

If I lay...

To Talk To You

PJ Harvey

Oh! Sweet Nuthin'

And everynight she falls when she does

She said

Oh sweet nuthin'

You know she ain't got nothing at all

Oh sweet nuthin'

She ain't got nothing at all

Oh! Sweet Nuthin'

The Velvet Underground

All Tomorrow's Parties

And what costume shall the poor girl wear

To all tomorrow's parties

A hand-me-down dress from who knows where

To all tomorrow's parties

And where will she go and what shall she do

When midnight comes around

She'll turn once more to Sunday's clown

And cry behind the door

And what costume shall the poor girl wear

To all tomorrow's parties

Why silks and linens of yesterday's gowns

To all tomorrow's parties

And what will she do with Thursday's rags

When Monday comes around

She'll turn once more to Sunday's clown

And cry behind the door

And what costume shall the poor girl wear

To all tomorrow's parties

For Thursday's child is Sunday's clown

For whom none will go mourning

A blackened shroud, a hand-me-down gown

Of rags and silks, a costume

Fit for one who sits and cries

For all tomorrow's parties

All Tomorrow's Parties

The Velvet Underground

Do Or Die

Farewell my friends

Farewell my dear ones

Farewell this world

Forgive my weakness

Goodbye my friends

Goodbye to evening parties

Remember me

In the spring

Before Departure

PJ Harvey

Cross My Heart

In the desert

I saw a creature, naked, bestial,

Who, squatting upon the ground,

Held his heart in his hands,

And ate of it.

I said: "Is it good, friend?"

"It is bitter-bitter," he answered;

"But I like it

Because it is bitter,

And because it is my heart."

In The Desert

Stephen Crane

La Bas

Aujourd'hui j'ai rien fait, J'ai ecouté les mouches voler

Dans leur vrombissement et leur reflets mer-de d'argent

La bas, on ne s'ennuies pas...

Si je respire encore je sais pas, peut etre je suis mort

Je peux plus m'enerver J'ai a peine la force de rêver

La bas, tout va bien pour moi...

La Bas

Noir Desir

Bug Eyes

Bring back those good ol' days

Nothing feels right

Nothing ever goes my way

I threw my future away

Now I walk alone

Out here in the cold

Wandering astray

Where's my future?

I'm gonna need a home

You'd expect the same, now wouldn't you, wouldn't you?

Your journey back to birth its haunting you it's haunting you

Your departure from the earth, its haunting you, it's haunting you

Bug Eyes

Dredg

I Don't Have Anything

I stood on mountaintops
That overlooked the world
I can't find anything
Except a void inside
I went to places where
I could forget your name
I can't find anything
Except a void inside
I don't have anything
Because i don't have you
I don't have anything
What can i buy to make the sky turn blue again?
Where can i go to feel like i'm alive again?
Show me the places
Where i can forget your name
I can't find anything
Except a void inside
I don't have anything
Because i don't have you
I don't have anything
I've been stripped of everything
Except some flesh that bleeds
And i've been robbed of everything

Except a soul, except a soul
That needs
You
Sweet you
I don't have anything
Because i don't have you
I don't have anything

Vast - I Don't Have Anything

La Mer

And when the day arrives

I'll become the sky

And I'll become the sea

And the sea will come to kiss me

For I am going

Home

Nothing can stop me now

La Mer

Nine Inch Nails

Wearing The Inside Out

From morning to night I stayed out of sight

Didn't recognize what I'd become

No more than alive I'd barely survive

In a word...overrun

Won't hear a sound

From my mouth

I've spent too long

On the inside out

My skin is cold

To the human touch

This bleeding heart's

Not beating much

I murmured a vow of silence and now

I don't even hear when I think aloud

Extinguished by light I turn on the night

Wear its darkness with an empty smile

I'm creeping back to life

My nervous system all away

I'm wearing the inside out

Look at him now

He's paler somehow

But he's coming round

He's starting to choke

It's been so long since he spoke

Well he can have the words right from my mouth

And with these words I can see

Clear through the clouds that covered me

Just give it time then speak my name

Now we can hear ourselves again

I'm holding out

For the day

When all the clouds

Have blown away

I'm with you now

Can speak your name

Now we can hear

Ourselves again

He's curled into the corner

But still the screen is flickering

With an endless stream of garbage to

...curse the place

In a sea of random images

The self-destructing animal

Waiting for the waves to break

He's standing on the threshold

Caught in fiery anger

And hurled into the furnace hell

...curse the place

He's torn in all directions

And the screen is still flickering

Waiting for the flames to break

Wearing The Inside Out

Pink Floyd

After Hours

One, two, three

If you close the door

The night could last forever

Leave the sunshine out

and say hello to never

All the people are dancing

and they're having such fun

I wish it could happen to me

After Hours

The Velvet Underground

Rock Tunisia

Marcel Coenen

Yram

Stream Of Consciousness

What about…
Tomorrow?
The blue sky?
The healing power of sunshine?
The better days that may rise?
Your hopes?
Your dreams?
Waiting for a wink from destiny
Your bleeding heart?
And the joy it may meet?
The stars?
The moon?
And your peaceful night?
The sea?
And the promises you carved on the shore?
It’s not enough! Not enough!
They are like opium to your wounds
What about…
Your agony?
Your blues?
The nausea you feel?
The sadness of your heart?
The grievance of your mind?
Your numb body?
Your snapshots in the dark?
The good time you left behind?
Your melancholic soulache?
The wheel of routine?
The despair you’re buried in?
Your words that scorned you?
Your bed that’s going to puke you?
Your room that hated you?
The suffocation you endure?
The voices inside of you?
The exhausted beat of your thoughts?
The poignant pain in your chest?
Your unpronounced shriek for rest?
They’re real! So real!
Feeding you with spleen
You, pathetic morbid!
You’re a living catastrophy
You’re an embryo of tears
What if you die?
Who would care?
Not even you, anyway!
What if you’re longing for leaving this world?
Is it fair to make you stay?
What if you lose the notion of time and space?
And you choose a coma as a fate?
Wouldn’t it be great?
You’ve grown too realistic for this life
Too realistic to believe in sweet lies

April 12th, 2008

Sadness Part 2

"Sa vie est comme des feux d'artifice qui implosent au lieu de s'élancer vers le haut"

Susanna Tamaro - Va où ton coeur te porte

A Dog's Life

Oh! It's starting again

This everlasting history with pain

It's a dog's life!

Chasing any pleasure away

Eyes are exhausted

Mourning their sour tears

A pale dead smile

Unveiling the grievance of many nights

Living in a permanent silence

That won't be broken

As if words are bathing

In a pool of bitter, futile veins

Gasping for breath

As if someone has locked the room

And left you there

And this melancholic head

Crying over the past years

Haunted by today's sad dreams

It's a dog's life!

Cold, cold

Like the day you first failed

When u fainted and bled

For the loss of your hopes

Your voice is a far cry

Into the night

Lamenting upon

Giving yourself away

Alone and shivering

You'll always stay

While people are celebrating

The rise of each ray

You're trying hard to believe in an illusion

How far illusions are from where you stand!

It's a dog's life!

Trapped like the day you're born

Life is showing you

Its sarcastic smile

Enjoy and drink

From this river of plight

You're a martyr of life

Are you a victim of fate?

Or maybe of your sterile mind?

Turn off all the lights

Lights do torture you a lot

Brainwash the memories

Erase the world around

Kill all the feelings inside

Destroy this thing called heart

Perhaps you'd survive

It's a dog's life!

It's happening again and again

You're trapped like the day you're born

No escape!

There's only a depressed shame!

April 9th, 2008

Sunday Morning

Sunday morning, praise the dawning

It's just a restless feeling by my side

Early dawning, sunday morning

It's just the wasted years so close behind

Sunday morning and I'm falling

I've got a feeling I don't want to know

Early dawning, sunday morning

It's all the streets you crossed, not so long ago

Sunday Morning

The Velvet Underground

Venus In Furs

I am tired, I am weary

I could sleep for a thousand years

A thousand dreams that would awake me

Different colors made of tears

Venus In Furs

The Velvet Underground

Obscured By Clouds

Obscured By Clouds